Running in Circles

Hazel started a little ballet class once a week back in January. It's a little group of church friends and the most darling mom and teacher, Lindsey Hanson. She has really liked it, but complained about too much stretching and getting so hungry. They had their 5 minute recital last night, and man she loved the performing part. 

They all were cute, but my favorite was Hazel during her solo. Eyes closed, dancing slowly, just totally in the zone! 

I'm not sure if she'll want to keep doing ballet or try a sport, but I'm so glad we gave it a try. 

Also, I really don't like this picture of myself but someday i'll be glad I included it.

I can barely keep my eyes open and it's 1:30 on Friday afternoon. This week has been long and overwhelming. 

I took on potty training Henry, and while he is mostly getting it 5 days later, it doesn't bother him when he is wearing wet underwear so that is becoming a major obstacle to fully getting it. We stayed home way too much this week, watched other people's kids, and did so much laundry. Today we made it to two stores and the library with no accidents and just potty breaks though.

I think I'm still recovering post marathon because I just feel on edge and tired all day. Exercise is such a mental release for me, but when my body is sore it's hard to hold back and recover.

 Brice has been applying to jobs, and interviewing, and scheduling fly outs, and waiting for more news all week too. I've spent too much time googling " things to do in...." and checking zillow to get informed on the rental and housing market. I even came home from teaching pilates still frazzled and quit my job. I'll teach through May but then I need a break. I like earning that extra money and it's making a difference in our savings but at the cost of my energy and mental sanity. 

The majority of my calling is done the last week of each month too. 

I know I need to be better at not letting the things happening around me, instantly overwhelm me. I know potty accidents are part of the process and probably will be for the next few weeks, but I'm tired and feelign emotional about lots of things.

It's Friday though- groceries are bought, sheets are washed, and the sun is out. I can do it, and it can even be enjoyable right!?

:: hazel ::

1. is growing up right in front of me.

2. The last few "school" days/playdates she insists on going to the front door by herself. She gets out of the car yells "love you Mom" and she's off!

3. loves playing with friends right now

4. Hazel, Kyle and Caleb (neighbor friends) played outside together yesterday and she was just filthy by the end but they had so much fun pretending to be on a snake hunt, looking at baby ducks, playing tag, and slopping through the creek.

5. is negotiating "toy trades" with Henry unsuccessfully.

6. cheers for Henry every time he uses the potty!

:: henry ::

1. had an evaluation with a speech therapist today. They were sure to tell me all the things he's doing great, but his expressive language needs some help. We will start therapy next month I think.

2. is so attached to his mama right now.

3. He has been using the potty daily but noncommittally, but I'm ready. We can do this. next Monday!

4. we bought underwear and skittles. 

5. has fallen asleep while eating lunch twice lately. 

6. insists on a certain corner of the couch for show watching.

7. finally outgrowing 12 month clothes.

Monday morning I was up at 6:45. I had laid everything out the night before so it was easy to get ready and out the door. Brice walked with me to Boston Commons, where all runners we're loading buses to the Athlete's Village.

The anxiety and excitement was so real and surrounded by thousands of people that had worked hard to get here was emotional. I said goodbye to Brice and got myself on a bus. It took about 40 minutes to get the Athlete's Village in Hopkinton. Basically we took up all the grass yard of a school. I was running in Wave 2 which started at 10:25 so I had about an hour to just kill. Some people were asleep on blankets and others waited in long lines for the potties. It actually went by pretty quickly and then it was time to line up and head towards the starting line.

Fighter jets flew over and the Elites started and then my wave started twenty minutes later. The first 3 miles went by so quickly, there's lots of weaving among runners and trying to find a pace, but by mile 5 my quads were already burning. I started drinking water at every other station hoping it would help. Miles 5-13 were so mental. I honestly was so taken back by how tired my legs already felt, I really wasn't sure if I could run the whole 26 miles. I knew I couldn't just quit but 26 miles felt impossible. I decided I needed to just take it one mile at a time, drink more, and slow down my pace.

I got to mile 13 and didn't feel much better but knew these miles would start ticking away and then I'd be left with only single digit miles. Honestly, my legs felt terrible the whole race. I made it up most of the hills without stopping to walk. Heartbreak Hill at mile 20 was not nearly as scary as I had built up in my head and when you're legs are already dead, what's one more hill...

Miles 21-26 were literally just getting one foot in front of the other. I probably walked for 8-10 minutes during these last miles (only 30 second intervals) but I was just so done. Finally I saw the Citgo sign at mile 25 and then turned onto Boylston Street and could see the finish line.That seemed to take forever to get closer to but I saw Brice and my parents and then finally crossed that finish line. 

I have to say even though my personal race was rough the spectators and the atmosphere of running the Boston Marathon is unreal! Between the Wellsley Girls, the fire station in Newton, thousands of families ringing cowbells, and people just begging for high fives- it was an experience I won't ever forget. 

I was exhausted but knew we were short on time to catch the metro to the airport for our flight and I wasn't sure how much slower I had been so as soon as I felt stable enough I just walked towards the hotel. I was so happy to see my family and to shower and be done. Honestly, I felt a little more frustrated and disappointed that it had felt so hard and miserable but it's ok! 

Sometimes we train and plan for things and expect them to work out easily and they don't- but things still must go on and we can still accomplish those hard things. Today I feel part of an elite club and although I never want to run hills again I am so grateful for the experience.

My next post will be a recap of the actual race but I wanted to post about the other things we did too.

Our weekend started with an evening flight into Boston. Brice quickly figured out the metro and got us to our AirBnB. My parents were already there and had already spent the afternoon at Fenway Park. We got some dinner and a few groceries and had a night in.

Saturday Morning we went to the Convention Center and got my bib, racing packet, and toured the EXPO. There is so much running crap for a sport that says all you need is shoes and you can go! ha

We spent Saturday morning at the Finish Line, taking it all in. The whole city was all about the marathon. It was awesome. We watched the cross country one mile races. These 13-17 year olds we're running 4:00-5:30 minutes miles! 

I was happy to try Sweetgreen for my last salad before the race and then we did the walking tour of historic Boston. It was great to see the interiors of old churches and graveyards and the architecture that is so old. Next we headed up to Harvard Square for a quick walk around campus. Honestly, the day was a lot of walking but it was so nice to sit on campus and just think.

On Sunday we took a 45 minute metro/walk trip to church in Cambridge. It is where all the MIT Students attend. There were probably 150 extra members there =, all visiting for the marathon. The Bishop, Tagg Romney called it Marathon Sunday although the talks were about Easter and they were wonderful!

We ended up switching to a hotel for Sunday night, not even a quarter of a mile away from the finish line because logistically we figured out we wouldn't have enough time to get our luggage or for me to shower post race before we had to catch our flight. After getting to our hotel it was time to carbo load and we found a yummy Pizza place. My parents dinners weren't spectacular but the pizza was!

I actually fell asleep easily although I was a nervous wreck all day...

Next post- marathon day!

:: hazel ::

1. All ready to go to ballet. She has requested that I learn how to braid better.

2. I bought her a little "highlights- hidden pictures" workbook and she's obsessed.

3. Asks for an apple everyday.

4. Loves riding her scooter around but has been yelling to people "WATCH OUT"

5. Acted out Moana yesterday. Her pretend ship was the kitchen chairs all upside down.

6. Keeps asking if I'm going to win my race or come in second?

7. loves performing, singing, and telling stories.

:: henry ::

1. The independence stage has kicked in strong. It takes him 5 minutes to buckle himself into his carseat but I'm letting him do it mostly.

2. Wants to climb on the kitchen counter anytime I start food prep.

3. Got to pet a horse yesterday and now stomps his foot, like the horse did to get the flies away.

4.  Gets really upset if we don't see construction during a car drive.

5. I finally got a referral from the doctor to see a speech therapist.

6. The baby ducks are hatching around the lake and he saw some and cradled his arms to tell me "baby." He loves real babes too!

7. We learned the signs to "brown bear brown bear"